Monday 5 March 2012

I am just bitter...

I was reading a post by Naked Pastor, and it got me thinking. You see, if you go through the process of trying to become a vicar, and are rejected, then everything negative you ever say about the church again, is considered to be a reaction against this, coming out of bitterness, and so can be disregarded.

Which is odd, because to get anywhere along the process, there has to be something that indicates that you are someone with something valuable to give to the church. In fact, they make that clear at the selection process in the Anglican church - "if you are not recommended, it does not mean that you are rejected, just that this is not the right ministry for you at this time". But there is a strong sense that you are rejected, and your views are no longer considered.

Of course, I am only saying this because I am bitter about the church. So I would suggest that you ignore it.

Now it might be true that many such people do talk out of their pain and bitterness. But the truth is that so many people are hurt by the church in some form that these people might be the ones who speak the truth more clearly. Yes, they might be bitter, but they might also not see the church with rose-tinted glasses, and actually have some realistic but harsh things to say. It may be that they are the ones who see - and can discuss - the church through and through with a true sense of realism.

As it is, the people who are listened to in the churches are primarily the ministers or clergy. These are the people for whom the system has worked, and so they are liable to be well disposed about it. And so the cycle goes on - those for whom the system does not work are ignored, those for whom it does work are listened to, and so everything in the garden is, apparently, rosy.

In reality, there is a bit of both. Yes, some of what I say comes out of hurts received, and the pain of my experience. So some of it is undoubtedly rubbish. But some of it is also, I believe, from taking a different view and perspective of the church and the world. If nothing else, it comes from an assumption that the church might actually be wrong and broken. That is a perspective that is worth listening to.

Of course, I am only saying this because I am a bitter twisted person. If I were you, I wouldn't listen to a word of it.

2 comments:

  1. In Church, as in all aspects of human existance, there are those who lead, those who follow, those who inspire, those who undermine, and those for who nothing ever works because deep within themselves there is something that prevents that person from fully engaging with others and the environment in which they find themselves. We have all been rejected at times by various people in numerous places and occassions in our lives....the triumph is to rise above our experiences and to take something positive out of the negative. If you can't do this then you will continue to travel in the same unending circle of bitterness and disappointment....the courage is in the trying to change.... people do listen but sometimes you don't hear their response because it is not what you might be seeking to hear.

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